You’ll never feel ready.

There’s never going to be a better time.

There are no guarantees in this life.

But you can count on the Truth:

a step into the unknown for God

leads into the Light you’re longing for.

What’s stopping you?

My son likes to look at the stats of my Unite in Prayer web site. He used to think it was cool that people from all over the world come to visit me. Now, he’s called my bluff. Mom, you really should be promoting this more. Why don’t you build an app or something to generate more traffic?

My answer has been: I don’t know. I’m busy. I don’t have time. Go practice piano. But in my heart of hearts, I’ve been trying to call out my own bluff. The truth is: I haven’t really known the answer. What’s stopping me from putting myself out there more? Why wouldn’t I want more people to see the prayers and devotionals I put so much thought into? Why does a big part of me want to keep my work private?

True, I really am busy. Also, I really want to write from my heart without worrying about what other people think. Plus, prayer is private between me and God, and I’m simply uncomfortable sharing it with others – it feels like putting my soul out on display, a little too vulnerable.

I keep thinking that if I work a little harder, clarify my vision a little more or make a more solid plan, then I’ll feel ready and confident to go all in, sharing my work more publicly.

But I’m starting to realize I’m never going to feel ready. Faith, after all, isn’t about a feeling. Faith is about listening for the still small voice, taking a step into the unknown and trusting that God will clear a path for us if we’re truly following His calling.

I know this well! Many times, I’ve followed Holy Spirit nudges and against all odds been blessed with grace, miracles, friendship and opportunities beyond my wildest dreams. I’m a huge believer in pushing past our comfort zones to open into new worlds that God has waiting for us – I think it’s the only way to fully embrace all that life has to offer.

But yesterday, I discerned another fear tugging at my heart that’s holding me back. I have this icky heavy feeling: What’s the point of sharing my work? Who do I think I am? Whose going to care what I have to say about God, when there are already so many other wonderful faith-filled voices out there? 

Now this one ticked me off! I’d been harboring a fugitive doubt without realizing it.

I am a woman, who spent 10 years changing diapers and shuffling kids around as a stay at home mom. I found a strong sense of meaning and purpose in the every day acts of love, even though outwardly, my only accomplishment was basically keeping my kids alive. Inwardly, deep down I knew I was growing closer to God, stronger in faith, humility, patience, wisdom by spreading love out into my kids and faith community through volunteer work. As a prayer warrior and a mom, I found meaning in the mundane because deep down, I knew I was following my calling from God for that time of my life.

Yet, here I am with a web platform that literally reaches people all over the world on a regular basis, and I’m harboring a fugitive belief that my writing somehow doesn’t matter and isn’t worth sharing. For Pete’s sake! My writing is more tangible than anything else I’ve poured my heart into for all these years.  The only difference is this calling is a little more unique and public, which forces me to push through my shy, private personality and fears.

Even if no one ever reads it again or only a few people do, if I’m following my calling from God, I should be confident and peaceful like I was as a stay at home mom and prayer warrior, simply knowing I’m following the Lord and growing closer to Him through the process.

Like pouring love into little kids, pouring love into writing is a good thing to do. Even if my poems don’t do what I want them to, neither do my kids half the time- it’s all good. Following God is all good. He works through our yeses to Him in mysterious ways that sometimes we frustratingly can’t discern in the moment, but the bottom line is He works through our prayers and yeses to Him, and we need to step out on faith and trust in Him as often as possible.

I started this blog because I have a heart for bringing people together, I believe in the power of prayer, and I believe in the power of words. I’m sure I won’t do it perfectly, and I legitimately can’t control the results of my efforts, but it’s a worthwhile endeavor to at least share my work a little more. If nothing else, I can tell my son I had the courage to push past my comfort zone and expect him to do the same next time God challenges him.

God, give us the courage to step out of our comfort zones and follow You always. Help us identify the fears that are holding us back, so we can work through them and step ever more fully into the light of Your love. In Jesus name we pray, Amen. 

Is God calling you to step out on faith past your comfort zone? Share your story below, and I’ll be happy to keep you in my prayers.